In one sentence, these are the different types of people who watch porn. (you can say the different kinds of guys if you want to.)

Species 1: All Porn is good Porn…

This species is bloody boring. They think that every friggin’ adult video that’s made is sexy and uh…titillating. Another instance of the extent of boredom that this guy generates is that I am sure you were bored reading the description of this kind of species.

Species 2: I am the guru…what are you?

This guy has made watching and downloading porn as the sole purpose for his existence. It’s very probable that this guy has a super fast internet connection and a 200 gb external hard disk. (200 gb of porn, to get him a hard on!)

He wakes up at night and sleeps throughout the day (read night unlimited.). If god came up to him and granted him a wish: He would ask for all the porn videos that exists right inside (digitally I mean) his hard disk.

This species is also a source of porn for the usual people (species 4) as he is the one uploading and sharing porn on internet with a user id like: Bl@d3M@$ter, TheUltimateGuru, coolboy_vivek, etc.

Species 3: My mom will Catch me…

This guy is as paranoid of his mom as Manmohan Singh is of Sonia Gandhi. However, he does love porn and is a type 1 species too (all porn good porn wala). Aur agar sale ko ek mauka mila toh apne dost ke ghar pe jaayega, aur usse porn dekhne ke liye force karega. Lekin jab wohi dost iske ghar pe aayega, to sale ki porn dekhne me gaand fatti hai.

Species 4: The usual…

He becomes a porn maniac only when his mom is not at home (other times he is content downloading). He was a type 1 when he began his porn education, but then he has matured now and is a type 4. (That didn’t make any sense but still…)

He loves fresh porn and can’t watch a clip more than twice. The biggest tragedy of his life is in not having a credit card to register on websites like Mr.Skin, Celebrity Movie Archive, etc.

Species 5: Watching Porn is a Sin…

Bah Humbug!! This is the most ridiculous kind of species (yeah worse than type 1). He is a big fat liar. He is so friggin’ ridiculous that he googles for the word “FUCK” the first time he hears it. Huh…If you are a type 5 species then you bloody get out of my blog coz’ you are ridiculous.

There are many more like:

1. No videsi only desi

2. Not Celebrity, Not Allowed

3. Only Lesbian (Muhahahaha)

4. Only Gay (Eeeks)

etc…etc…

Add more in the comments if you know of it.

Cheers,

Sameer Jha

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