Funthusia

2:00 pm

It was the time when I was alone in my bedroom, with no clothes, no pubic hair and a letter clutched in my hand.

The letter was from District Sports Authority, which read that they needed my blood samples. The news was as shocking for me as the news of all the porn getting deleted from my computer.

Anyways, I guess they have started checking now and I would be in great trouble if they successfully check mine.

I looked around myself for clues but the only clue I could get was that I was in deep shit and I needed to make some arrangements to get out of the shit. I had absolutely no clue about the arrangements though.

Then something struck me…No…not the new Mirinda Orangy Blast… but an idea.

I picked up the receiver and punched in a few digits.

“You…
Do You remember me…
Like I remember you…”

This guy had a nice caller tune…Someone picked up the receiver on the other side.

“Hello Rajeev.”

I had called up Neil. He was a friend of mine whose father was probably the doctor who was going to check my blood for the drugs.

“Neil, yaar, I need your help.”

“What kind of help?”

“Umm…does your father still works as the consultant doctor of the sports authority?”

“Yeah. What with that?”

“Okay cool. Now listen to what I am saying very carefully.”

I explained the whole thing to him. I explained how he was going to save me from the trouble I would face if the authority gets me. I even explained his role in saving me.

“It’s not that easy, Rajeev. I have to steal keys, get into their lab, and all that. It’s fucking risky.”

“Dude! The security is all fucked up! You can easily bribe them. I’ll pay the amount of bribes given.”

“Okay fine.”

“I guess you should come to my place now to discuss the plan in some more detail.”

“In an hour, Eisenhower.”

“No time for jokes, Neil.”

“Bye. See ya.”

“Bye”

3:15 pm

The plan was a bit like something that you see in the movies though the risks involved over here were not of that magnitude and it was a lot safer to execute. The principle used over here was simple:- Exchange the samples. Even a third grade kid can think of that now. Mostly, because of the wonderful movies that are being made these days.

“What would I get in return for all this?”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, why do I do this.”

“Neil, you are supposed to be my friend. Help me out in times of need.”

“Well, then dude I need something.”

“What?”

“I need to fuck you.”

I was more shocked than angry. It answered quite a few questions. He didn’t mingle with girls not because he cared about his career but because he was a homosexual.

“I am not going to do this. I don’t care if it ends my fucking career.”

I felt a bit better now.

“Cool man! You don’t have to worry about your career…”

“Why?”

“Well for one, this is just a part of some stupid author’s imagination.”

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